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Finding out... {part 3}

Published: Aug 24, 2013 · Modified: May 17, 2016 by Ashley Phipps · 1768 words. · About 9 minutes to read this article. · 113 Comments · This post may contain affiliate links · This blog generates income via ads and sponsored posts · This blog uses cookies · See our privacy policy for more info Filed Under: Trisomy 18 Baby

I love all comments I receive but please know that this is a topic currently very tender to me, these are my very personal thoughts, feelings and beliefs and this is very difficult to share with my closest friends and family, it is extraordinarily difficult to put this on my blog.  So please, please be respectful in your commenting.

Please read Part 1 and Part 2 of my story HERE and HERE.

Our Trisomy 18 baby story! Find out all about our journey of trying to build our family and our trials associated with finding out we have a Trisomy 18 baby. #trisomy18 #children #birth #family

We were devastated with the news that our baby was at high risk for Trisomy 18.  The prognosis of a Trisomy 18 baby is so incredibly sad, and the whole thing broke our hearts.

If you have caught on in my previous posts, or if you know us, you know that we are deeply religious.  And we love the Lord and trust in His plan.  After many prayers and a blessing we have been blessed with a huge sense of peace.

Peace and strength.

We did not know the outcome of this situation yet, but we felt and knew that we could handle it.  And we had peace that no matter what happened, it would all be ok.

A week after I received the news that my quad screen came back positive, on August 15th, 2013, we had an apt with a specialist.

We spent over 4 hours at a specialists office.

We spoke with a genetic counselor who informed us more about Trisomy 18, how the quad screen works and what some of our options were for further testing.  We learned more about Trisomy 18 and that it is almost always a random genetic problem resulting in either the egg or sperm having an extra set of chromosome 18, prior to conception.

This is random, not hereditary (well, very very very rarely it can be hereditary.)  Trisomy 18 happens when the baby gets 3 sets of the 18th chromosome instead of just two.  And the body just doesn't work well when there are extra, or too few, chromosomes.

She also told us that my quad screen indicated a 1 in 2 chance that this baby had Trisomy 18.  That was such sad news.

 
You can't get worse chances then 1 in 2.
Not when you are talking about people anyway.

Next, we had an ultrasound.  We knew some of the things they would be looking for on the ultrasound and we also asked, if by chance, they could check to see if it was a boy or a girl!

Only a few minutes into the ultrasound, we got that perfect shot and it was very clear to all of us that it was a BOY!

But we were both so happy with the opportunity to bring another sweet little boy into our lives and family!

But the typically happy news, was dampened by the worries about our baby.  I have never had an ultrasound be so un-exciting.  It was a strange and sad feeling.

As the ultrasound progressed, the tech only told us what she was looking at, but not if things were right or wrong.

But she didn't have to.  Both my husband and I saw things on the ultrasound that didn't look right.  We both just knew.

After a long ultrasound, the dr came in and reviewed the ultrasound with us.

She told us when we already "knew."  

She told us that according to the ultrasound, the baby showed multiple signs of Trisomy 18.  And the ultrasound results, in conjunction with my quad screen results most likely indicated that he had Trisomy 18.

I am a tough cookie.  I rarely let people see my cry when I am hurting, I can usually hold it back.  But I couldn't hold back the flood gates that day.

As I lie on an exam table, with ultrasound gel all over my growing belly, I simply broke down.  

My husband grabbed one hand and the sweet kind dr grabbed the other.  And they just let me cry.

I tried as hard as I could to pull it together but it was impossible.  The sadness just hit me.  I was so sad that this sweet little baby boy had to go through this.  I was so sad at the thought of losing this baby who I could daily feel move inside of me.  I was grieving the future loss of our child.

After a little while, I was able to stop crying and the dr took another look at the ultrasound.  She pointed out the things we had already seen on the ultrasound: bilateral clubbed feet and a clenched hand with fingers that didn't look quite right.  And she pointed out one thing we didn't see: two cysts on his brain.

Three markers for Trisomy 18.

We decided that we wanted to know for sure.  The screening and ultrasound were pretty good indicators, but we wanted actual, scientific, for-sure answers.

We opted to have an amniocentesis.  It was uncomfortable and slightly painful, but it thankfully wasn't as bad as I imagined it being.

I kept telling myself, "It can't be as bad as labor and I've survived labor."  Thankfully it was no where near as painful as labor.

And I knew we would get actual, definite results.  That was all on a Thursday.

We got rapid results the following Monday afternoon (August 19th, 2013).  The rapid results are definite results.  They actually count the number of 18th chromosome strands in a single cell from the baby and they could see three chromosome 18s.

I was told there was positive evidence that this baby had Trisomy 18.

We finally knew what we already "knew":  our baby has Trisomy 18.

On Thursday, August 22nd, 2013, I received another phone call from the specialists office.  They had gotten the full amnio results.  Again it confirmed that our baby has Trisomy 18.  It also indicated that it was full Trisomy 18 (the entire 18th chromosome was there instead of just part of it) and that it was not at all hereditary.

Our sweet little baby boy has Trisomy 18.

I can't begin to explain some of the emotions that we are going through.

We are so sad, but we also have hope, a lot of hope based in our faith.  And a lot of peace.

We believe that families are forever.  Forever.  So we know that even if we don't get to spend much time with our sweet little boy on earth, he will be with us again.

And he will be our son for eternity.  

We know that Heavenly Father is well aware of what we are going through right now, and although science says it is "random" I have no doubt that this is not a random occurrence.  There is a greater plan.  There is a higher purpose.

We believe we lived in Heaven before we came to earth and we believe that we chose to come down here to be tested in order to progress spiritually and to be able to return to live with our Heavenly Father some day.  And we know that some spirits are just so special to Heavenly Father, for various reasons, that they need to be protected here, or they only need a body for a short period of time.

I don't have answers to all of life's mysteries and I don't fully understand the inner workings of God's plan (still waiting for my manual to arrive :).  But I do have faith and hope and I believe that this sweet little boy is such a special spirit that he only needed to come down here for a very short period of time in order to get a body.

And I am truly humbled that Heavenly Father has entrusted us with this amazing spirit.  I am humbled and grateful to know that this amazing spirit will be ours forever and that even if I don't get to know him in this life, I will have all of eternity to get to know what an incredible person he is.

I am humbled that the Lord would trust us with this very special baby.
  
And I am humbled that He believes that we are strong enough to handle this trial.
When you come out of the storm.... great quote about trials with free printable! Love this! #quote #freeprintable #free #freebie

click here to download for free

I know we will have many hard days ahead of us.  I know that I will shed many more tears.  But I also know that in the end, it will be ok, and we will be ok.

So if you see me get a little teary eyed, please know that I will be ok.  Please know that all comments, emails, texts, phone calls and hugs are greatly appreciated!

But if you see me get a little teary eyed, please just grant us a little grace during this time.
 
And if you see me happy and smiling, please know that that is ok too!  

We all grieve and go through trials in different ways.  And I am a happy person, so most of the time you will see me happy!

We are eternally grateful for a loving and caring God who has blessed us with his love, peace and comfort during this time.  We are grateful for so much that our hearts are overflowing.

We are grateful for the outpouring of love we have received from our friends, family and my amazing blog followers!  It helps strengthen and uplift us.  It means the world to us.  Please don't go away too fast.

This story will be a journey for us.  I am not due until January so this story might go on for some time, and it will always live in our hearts.  I plan to continue to share our experiences as we go through the next few months.  And I hope you will bare with me as I get a little more personal then usual during this time.

Much love and thanks for your prayers, love and support!

Here are all the posts in this series about our family's journey:

Finding Out... {part 1}
Finding Out... {part 2}
Finding Out... {part 3}
20 Week Doctor Appointment {Our Trisomy 18 Baby}
Fetal Echo {Our Trisomy 18 Baby}
I Choose Joy! {Our Trisomy 18 Baby}
Where to Lay our Baby Down to Rest {Our Trisomy 18 Baby}
Today we Mourn the Loss {Our Trisomy 18 Baby}
Not Compatible with Life, but Compatible with Joy {Part 1}
Without the Rain there Would Never be Rainbows
Not Compatible with Life, but Compatible with Joy : Our Trisomy 18 Baby's Birth Story {Part 2}
"So You've Had 6 Pregnancies..."
Big News for Our Family and our 6th Pregnancy

More Trisomy 18 Baby

  • favorite baby gear part 1
    Must Have Baby Gear : Part 1
  • How to Choose a Diaper Bag
    How to Choose a Diaper Bag
  • summer maternity clothes
    How to Look Your Best in Summer Maternity Clothes
  • 20 week ultrasound
    Pregnancy #6 : Week 19-20 Update

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Rachel Willis

    August 24, 2013 at 10:41 am

    He will certainly give you the strength that you need. I pray for His peace washes over you and your family every step of the way.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 24, 2013 at 11:54 am

      Thank you so much Rachel! Your prays mean so much to us!

      Reply
  2. Stacy

    August 24, 2013 at 10:51 am

    Praying for you and your family. God is so awesome and it is great that you have faith in Him. He brings us through so many things in life and after each and every one of them we are stronger through Him.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 24, 2013 at 11:55 am

      Thank you Stacy! Your sweet words are so kind! Thank you! And thank you for the prayers!! They mean the world so us!

      Reply
  3. Kristina Grapes

    August 24, 2013 at 10:56 am

    My husband&#39;s youngest brother, Abe, had trisomy 18. His mom has shared her story with me, and it sounds much like yours. Abe survived birth into this world, incredibly. He is no longer here today, but Abe serves as inspiration to his whole family. They are living their lives to make Abe proud. :)<br /><br />Lots of prayers coming your way!

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 24, 2013 at 11:57 am

      Thank you for sharing Kristina! It means so much to me that you would do that. And I love that...that they are living their lives to make him proud. What a wonderful inspiration to live better. Thank you.

      Reply
  4. Sarah Lunt

    August 24, 2013 at 11:00 am

    I love your strength and that you have turned to the Lord. What a special baby and family! I know storm hasn&#39;t completely passed yet but what a great perspective you have! Many hugs and prayers for you all.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 24, 2013 at 11:58 am

      Thank you so much Sarah. You are so sweet and kind. And thank you for the prayers!<br />

      Reply
  5. Cindy Rowe

    August 24, 2013 at 11:02 am

    I&#39;m honored you are sharing your special story with you. God chooses the right people, He knows. This boy is something special and he is lucky to have you. Prayers and hugs.<br />Cindy

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 24, 2013 at 12:00 pm

      Thank you Cindy. You are so nice to say that! Thanks for the prayers!

      Reply
  6. Shannon Lamb

    August 24, 2013 at 11:02 am

    Through my tears I just wanted to send a little note of love and encouragement. It is so hard to know why we have such difficult trials, you are handling it so well. It&#39;s at times like these that the Gospel is truly a shining light in the darkness of our trials. Love you guys!<br />Shannon

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 24, 2013 at 12:01 pm

      Thank you Shannon!! Your kind words mean so much to us!! Isn&#39;t the gospel the best ever!? 🙂 We love you guys too! Miss you 🙂

      Reply
  7. Patty Hibble

    August 24, 2013 at 11:45 am

    Ashley...it&#39;s ok to cry. to breakdown. to curl up in a corner and wail at the top of your lungs. in front of people. or just you and God. I admire your strength, faith and love. for this baby. for your family. for our God.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 24, 2013 at 12:02 pm

      Patty! 🙂 Thank you! You are so sweet to leave your kind words. Thanks so much.

      Reply
  8. Susan

    August 24, 2013 at 11:50 am

    So sorry you are going through this but am so glad you know our Heavenly Lord and have Him to see you through. If you don&#39;t know Angie Smith or are not familiar with her story or book, I wish you would check it out. http://www.amazon.com/Will-Carry-You-Sacred-Dance/dp/080546428X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&amp;ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1377359249&amp;sr=1-1

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 24, 2013 at 12:02 pm

      Susan, Thank you so much for the book link! I can&#39;t wait to check it out! And thanks for your kind words. Have a lovely day.

      Reply
  9. Design Dazzle

    August 24, 2013 at 12:10 pm

    Ashley,<br />This is such a huge trial to get through - but you will get through this. And yes, you have been entrusted with a special boy who will be with you forever. It&#39;s hard to understand the ultimate joy when you have to go through such pain.<br />We are praying for you. Hugs to you and your family. <br />Toni

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 24, 2013 at 12:40 pm

      Toni,<br />Thank you so much! I so appreciate your kindness and friendship, your love and support. They mean the world to both of us!!<br />Thank you!<br />Much love,<br />Ash

      Reply
  10. Heidi @ Happiness is Homemade

    August 24, 2013 at 1:32 pm

    Oh Ashley, I sit here with tears streaming down my face, in awe of the strength that you possess. You are an incredible woman, and you have the most beautiful attitude and mindset to get through this difficult time of trial. That sweet little soul is blessed to have such a courageous and understanding family. Still sending lots of prayers for you guys! You know I&#39;m here if you need anything!

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 24, 2013 at 2:05 pm

      Heidi,<br /><br />Thank you so much for your kind words! And your sweet encouragement. <br /><br />We truly appreciate all of your thoughts and prayers! Thank you so much for everything!<br /><br />Ashley

      Reply
  11. Erikramer1

    August 24, 2013 at 2:05 pm

    love and prayers to you and your beautiful family thank you for sharing your story

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 24, 2013 at 2:05 pm

      Thank you so much for your love and prayers! They are truly appreciated!

      Reply
  12. Capturing Joy with Kristen Duke

    August 24, 2013 at 3:19 pm

    I love that you are sharing your story, as painful as it might be, I&#39;m hoping it is also cathartic at the same time. There is something about sharing grief that brings us all together, to realize we are all in this together, to hopefully help someone else out. Our Father in Heaven knows and loves you, and knows how much you love this baby. Thanks for sharing...

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:42 am

      Oh thank you so much Kristen! It was not an easy thing to share...I am typically quite private. But I really felt it was a story that needed to be shared. So thank you so much for your sweet words and your encouragement! <br /><br />Thank you so much for your kind words, they mean so so much to us! I am so happy to know you!

      Reply
  13. Sharon @ Elizabeth & Co.

    August 24, 2013 at 4:31 pm

    Dear Ashley, Just a note to say that I am keeping your family in my thoughts and prayers. I hope that you draw strength and courage not only from your faith, but from the love and support of those who care about you, even from a distance. Hugs to you and your family!

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:42 am

      Thank you so much for your kind words! You are so sweet and all the thoughts and prayers are so much appreciated! Thank you so much!

      Reply
  14. Japolina

    August 24, 2013 at 4:56 pm

    You are in my thoughts. Hugs to you and your husband.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:43 am

      Thank you so much!

      Reply
    • Japolina

      August 25, 2013 at 5:06 pm

      I thought about you a lot today. Isn&#39;t it weird how you in cyberspace, you feel for others that you&#39;ve never met. I&#39;m not the religious -praying type and when I do pray, I am not public about it, but please know that me, and many others out there are sending you positive thoughts and strength. My wise grandmother said that everything happens for a reason but when it happens to

      Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:23 pm

      Oh thank you so much! And I agree, it is amazing how the internet can bring people together!! Simply amazing! Thank you so much for your thoughts and kind words. They truly do mean so much to me! Thank you!

      Reply
  15. Jill @ Create.Craft.Love.

    August 24, 2013 at 7:11 pm

    Sitting here sobbing as I read this. Praying for God&#39;s wisdom and strength to guide you through this. I wish there was something I could say that would ease the pain for you. Just know that I am here if you need to cry or vent. Big hugs to all of you!!

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:43 am

      Jill,<br />Thank you so so much for your kind sweet words! They mean so much to us! Thank you

      Reply
  16. Laurie from Laurie Jones Home

    August 24, 2013 at 7:40 pm

    This was so beautifully written and I have no doubt that sweet baby of yours knows how much you love him! Thinking of you and praying!! xo

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:44 am

      Laurie,<br /><br />Thank you so much for your sweet words. And for all of your support you&#39;ve given me! I am so happy we have met and I am so happy to have you in my life! Thank you!

      Reply
  17. Julia Martin

    August 24, 2013 at 7:58 pm

    Ashley, thanks for sharing your story. I don&#39;t keep in touch with the family as much as I should so I had no idea what you have been going through. Stay strong, you certainly are a tough cookie! Sending lots of love your way &lt;3

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:45 am

      Julia,<br /><br />Oh thank you so much for your sweet words! You are such a sweet young women! And I am so happy that you are family! <br /><br />Thanks for the kind words and the love!<br /><br />Keep in touch!<br />Ash

      Reply
  18. Level 1 Homemaker

    August 24, 2013 at 8:08 pm

    May God continue to grant you peace and strength. **I** am humbled, reading your post. I feel that my trials are so big, so terrible. . . and I see you shouldering yours with such grace. If I could hug you and cry with you, I would. God bless you, all three.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:46 am

      Thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful words. You are so sweet to take the time to send such words of love and encouragement. Thank you so so much!

      Reply
  19. mrs. c

    August 24, 2013 at 9:16 pm

    I believe that everything happens for a reason and you and your husband are showing us such grace and faith that it will inspire everyone who comes in contact with you. You are a beacon of faith and light, God bless you.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:47 am

      Oh wow, I am truly humbled by your words! Thank you for your sweet encouragement and your kindness! You are so nice to say that, thank you for your kind words!

      Reply
  20. bonniegetchell

    August 24, 2013 at 11:32 pm

    I&#39;m praying for you, your little one, and your family! My friend is going through the exact same thing as you, so my heart is especially hurting for you and for her and her husband. I can&#39;t imagine. Like you, though, we have faith that God knows exactly what is going on and He has everything under control! Praying for you all!<br /><br />-Bonnie @ Revolutionaries<br />

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:48 am

      Bonnie,<br />Oh wow, what a small world! I am so sorry you have a friend going through this as well! <br /><br />Thank you so much for sharing. And for your kind sweet words. I truly appreciate it!

      Reply
  21. Shannon

    August 25, 2013 at 12:51 am

    This song has comforted me during different trials http://www.songlyrics.com/laura-story/blessings-lyrics/. You could also listen to it on You Tube if you haven&#39;t heard the beautiful melody. The girl who wrote it was inspired by her husband&#39;s bout with cancer. I love the truth of the words! My in-laws dealt with something similar to you, but didn&#39;t know until after the baby was born.

    Reply
    • Shannon

      August 25, 2013 at 12:52 am

      Actually there is a link to listen to it right there on songlyrics.com, in case you didn&#39;t see that.

      Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:50 am

      Thank you so much! I can&#39;t wait to listen to the song! I love music and take much comfort from it, so thank you!<br /><br />I truly appreciate your kind words. And for taking the time to comment. (THANKS KRISTEN for sending you here!!)<br /><br />Thank you so much for your prayers and kind thoughts. They mean the world to us! And thanks so much for stopping by!

      Reply
  22. bakemeapatticake

    August 25, 2013 at 2:36 am

    Ashley, I feel that the Lord brings us through trials and also brings people into our lives for a purpose. I once had a baby with complete trisomy 18 as well. I was actually baptized, at 24, a week before finding out my baby had issues. It&#39;s been 12 years, almost to the day, of my experience. I now have three amazingly beautiful daughters, one older than that baby and two younger. I wish I

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:52 am

      Thank you so much for sharing your tender story with me. I am so sorry you had to go through a similar experience. And at 24, you were so young to have to deal with such heartache. I am so sorry for your loss. <br /><br />But I am also so grateful that you have three sweet daughters as well! What a blessing in your family! <br /><br />Thank you so much for your kind words, your thoughts and

      Reply
  23. Laura S

    August 25, 2013 at 8:42 am

    Thank you for being strong enough to share this. I know what you&#39;re going through. About a year ago we found out our unborn daughter had a rare abnormality called mosaic isodicentric 21st chromosomes. Our outlook was just as grim. We had those same doctor visits. I wrote about it on my blog: http://www.preciouscrumblesoffaith.blogspot.com<br />In the end, God blessed us. We had two days with our

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 25, 2013 at 9:53 am

      Laura,<br /><br />Thank you SO much for sharing your tender story with me! I am so sorry you&#39;ve had a similar experience (I wouldn&#39;t wish this on anyone!)! But I am so glad that you had two days with your sweet baby girl! How precious! <br /><br />I can&#39;t wait to read your blog! I am so grateful you are sharing this with me.<br /><br />And thank you for all your kind sweet words

      Reply
  24. Hetty

    August 25, 2013 at 6:57 pm

    My love and prayers to you and your family, Ashley. The journey will test you on many levels, but I believe you are very strong. Thanks for sharing your personal story and may God help you and your family..

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:28 pm

      Thank you so much for your love and prayers! I truly appreciate your kind words. Thank you!

      Reply
  25. Sarah @ Thrifty Decor Chick

    August 25, 2013 at 11:22 pm

    Oh Ashley, my heart is breaking for you all. I am so very sorry to hear about your sweet boy. I wish I could hug you right now. 🙂 Please know I am praying and thinking about you.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:32 pm

      Sarah,<br /><br />Thank you so much for sweet words! I truly appreciate your prayers and thoughts, they mean the world to us! Thank you so much!<br /><br />Ashley

      Reply
  26. Tarah

    August 26, 2013 at 9:53 am

    I don&#39;t have the words that seem to fit how I wish to comfort you right now. I&#39;ve tried to type them out but they just sound wrong or not strong enough or not clear enough. Instead, I&#39;m offering a hug, a huge hug from one mother to another. I think hugs speak the clearest of all communication. I&#39;m offering support and a shoulder. <br /><br />You are a wonderful person, an

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:33 pm

      Oh Tarah thank you so much for your kind words and for your hug 🙂 Your sweet words of encouragement and support mean so so much to us! Thank you so much!

      Reply
  27. Barb Ullman

    August 26, 2013 at 10:55 am

    Hugs and prayers to you -- we will give you our cell phone numbers -- call us any time -- day or night -- if we can help. Blessings, Barb (neighbor across the street)

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:35 pm

      Oh Barb!! Thank you so much for your kind words! You guys are so sweet! And just the best neighbors ever 🙂 Thanks so much for your support and prayers, the mean the world to us! Thank you!

      Reply
  28. Erin

    August 26, 2013 at 1:58 pm

    Gracious, my heart hurts for you right now. It&#39;s refreshing, though, to see such a strong testimony from a believer! I&#39;m sure it&#39;s taken a lot of courage to share this with your readers, but I know we&#39;re all thankful you did so that we specifically can know how to pray for you. Prayers and virtual hugs to you!

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:37 pm

      Erin, thank you so much for your nice words and for your encouragement! Yes, it was super scary to share all of this online, but the outpouring has been simply amazing and all of the love and support are incredible! So thank you so so much for your hugs and prayers! They mean so so much to us!

      Reply
  29. Crafty Girl

    August 26, 2013 at 3:40 pm

    I went through a similar process with my daughter. Fortunately for us we were blessed to have a healthy child. I am so sorry for all you have to go through, the emotional roller coaster. I, too, will be thinking and praying for you and your family. I hope that all these prayers can help you have peace.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:38 pm

      Thank you so much for sharing your story with me! And I am so glad you have a healthy little girl! What a blessing! I am so thrilled for you! And thank you so much for your thoughts and prayers! I truly appreciate it, it means so much!

      Reply
  30. Ann Marie Heasley

    August 26, 2013 at 4:11 pm

    I&#39;m so sorry, Ashley. Many prayers for you, your family, and your sweet little boy.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:38 pm

      Thank you so much for your kind words and for your prayers! We are so grateful for them! Thank you!

      Reply
  31. LauraB

    August 26, 2013 at 5:57 pm

    Ashley, I came across your blog through Pinterest. Thank-you for sharing your journey. I love the beauty of the body of Christ. We have the privelege to pray for each other and find strength and encouragement even from those we don&#39;t know. Prayers for your precious family and a strength and peace from our Father. -Laura

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:40 pm

      Laura,<br />I am so glad you found me! Thank you so much for stopping by and for taking the time to comment! And thank you so much for your prayers! We are very grateful for them! Thank you!

      Reply
  32. Erin Spain

    August 26, 2013 at 6:25 pm

    Praying for you and your family, Ashley!<br /><br />-Erin @ DIY on the Cheap

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:40 pm

      Thank you so so much Erin! We truly appreciate it!

      Reply
  33. Doreen Grose

    August 26, 2013 at 7:26 pm

    Amazed at the strength that God has given you thus far. He will continue to walk with you through this time. You are an inspiration to a lot of people. I will continue to pray for your family and this journey.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:41 pm

      Thank you so much for your kind words Doreen! Your words of encouragement mean so much to us! And thank you so much for the prayers! We are so grateful for them!

      Reply
  34. pruttybird

    August 26, 2013 at 7:49 pm

    Thank you for sharing such a personal story. I&#39;m praying for you and our family

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 26, 2013 at 9:42 pm

      Thank you so much for your nice comment! And thank you for your prayers! They mean so much to us!

      Reply
  35. Chelsea @ two twenty one

    August 26, 2013 at 11:32 pm

    Oh, Ashley, I&#39;m so sorry. I can&#39;t imagine how difficult and heart-breaking this must be for you and your family. But you&#39;ve shown so much strength already in writing your story and sharing it with others. Please let me know if you need anything. Like Brad and I, I know you all don&#39;t have family in the area so please let me know if there&#39;s anything we can do.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 28, 2013 at 5:10 pm

      Oh thank you so much Chelsea! I truly appreciate your kind words and your offer to help! I will definitely keep you guys in mind :):) It means so much to us! So happy we know each other! And thanks again for all your kind support!

      Reply
  36. Emily Bass

    August 27, 2013 at 12:01 am

    I too share your religion and I admire your faith and strength at this very difficult time for you, and your family.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 29, 2013 at 8:39 pm

      Thank you so much Emily! I truly appreciate your kind words!

      Reply
  37. Jen

    August 27, 2013 at 1:06 am

    How brave and bold of you to put this out there for all of us!<br /><br />You aren&#39;t related to Sherry Phipps in Brigham, are you? We just moved here and she&#39;s in our ward. Great lady!

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 29, 2013 at 8:39 pm

      Jen,<br /><br />Oh thank you. <br /><br />I am not related that I know of!<br /><br />Ashley

      Reply
  38. Marty Walden

    August 27, 2013 at 4:30 am

    Sweet lady, I can&#39;t even relate to your personal story, but I know hard. I&#39;ve lived hard for years. We have 2 biological children and then adopted a sibling group of 3 children, all with Attachment Disorders and many other diagnoses. It&#39;s been 13 years and my adopted children still struggle with who they are and the difficulties they have because of their birth parents choices. But I

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 29, 2013 at 8:51 pm

      Marty,<br /><br />Thank you so much for your kind words! <br /><br />Thank you for sharing your story. I am so sorry you have such trials. And I&#39;m so glad that you have faith to help see you through it all!!

      Reply
  39. Karyn

    August 28, 2013 at 7:32 pm

    You are amazing and so strong. Thank you for posting this. Isn&#39;t it wonderful to know that families are forever? Our thoughts and prayers are with you at this difficult time.<br />-Karyn Johnson

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 29, 2013 at 8:51 pm

      Karyn,<br /><br />Thank you so much for your kind words and for your prayers! Yes, it is so wonderful to have that knowledge!<br /><br />Thanks so much<br />Ashley

      Reply
  40. Erin

    August 29, 2013 at 10:25 pm

    I often come for your link party, but I haven&#39;t been around for several weeks to have read of your pregnancy. I have a friend who last year had a baby boy with Trisonomy 18. She shared her journey through a Caringbridge site and her feelings were both heartbreaking and uplifting to follow at the same time. Their sweet baby boy touched many lives in the short time he was in the world. I&#39;m

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 31, 2013 at 12:44 pm

      Erin,<br /><br />Thank you so much for stopping by and for taking the time to leave such a nice comment! I appreciate you sharing of your friend&#39;s story...I will have to try to look up that site!<br /><br />Thank you so much!<br />Ashley

      Reply
  41. Jenn

    August 30, 2013 at 9:44 am

    I truly admire your strength of spirit that shines through here. I can&#39;t even begin to imagine what you must be going through, but sending you peace and strength while you travel this road.<br /><br />Hugs.<br /><br />

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 31, 2013 at 12:44 pm

      Jenn,<br /><br />Thank you so much for your heartfelt comments! They mean so much to us!<br /><br />Ashley

      Reply
  42. Sherrie - Owner

    August 31, 2013 at 10:16 am

    My heart is with you and your family. I found out at 18 weeks that my son had cyctic hydroma / fetal hydrops . I carried him until I was 23 weeks. He is my eternal son. I will say time does heal and you will never forget him it has been 13 years. As a mother you will feel him with you even when he is with God. God Bless you and your family.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 31, 2013 at 12:45 pm

      Sherrie,<br /><br />Thank you so much for sharing your story with me! And your kind sweet words. They mean so much to me. <br /><br />Thank you!<br />Ashley

      Reply
  43. Candice

    August 31, 2013 at 10:52 am

    Thank you for sharing your story. I&#39;m sure that must be incredibly difficult. My son also has an abnormality of the 18th chromosome, called 18q deletion syndrome. A bit of material from his 18th chromosome is missing. There is a wonderful organization that researches all abnormalities of the 18th chromosome (including Trisomy 18) and provides a network for parents. I know there are other

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      August 31, 2013 at 12:46 pm

      Candice,<br /><br />Thank you so much for sharing your own story with me! Your kids words of inspiration and hope are so comforting!<br /><br />Thank you so much!<br />Ashley

      Reply
  44. Theresa @junk2jewels-diy.blogspot.com

    September 01, 2013 at 12:52 am

    My heart goes out to you. I know that Heavenly Father knew your family would show this little boy all the love and care he needed for his journey here. My prayers, love and compassion are with you and yours. Hugs &amp; Smiles, Theresa

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      September 03, 2013 at 6:25 pm

      Thank you so much for your kind words Theresa!!

      Reply
  45. Shanna Gilbert

    September 03, 2013 at 5:23 pm

    Ashley- I an so sorry that you are having to go through this. I know that God will get you through it. He will give you the strength and he will take care of your little boy. You are in my thoughts and prayers and I will help you out in any way that I can.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      September 03, 2013 at 6:25 pm

      Oh thank you so much for your kind words Shanna! They mean so much to us! And thank you for your thoughts and prayers! I really appreciate it!!

      Reply
  46. Grace Dobson

    September 04, 2013 at 11:23 pm

    Ashley:<br /> If He bring you to it, He will bring you through it. We step out on faith everyday and I have faith that you and your family will be blessed by God in His mercy and discernment of your situation. Hang tough!! I&#39;ve got your back

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      September 08, 2013 at 10:01 pm

      Thank you so much for your kind words Grace!

      Reply
  47. The Mrs.

    September 08, 2013 at 1:47 pm

    Ashley, I&#39;ve only recently found your blog and I am so thankful I did. I just sat here and read all the parts of this story you&#39;re right in the middle of and I&#39;m blessed by your faith in the Lord and the fact that He knew all along. He&#39;s knitting together this precious boy, after all! You&#39;re right there amongst the Hebrews 11 &quot;Heroes of the Faith&quot; as far as I&#39;m

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      September 08, 2013 at 10:04 pm

      Alicia,<br /><br />Thank you so much for your uplifting and kind words. It means so much to me. And thank you so much for the prayers and thoughts. I truly appreciate it. Thank you!

      Reply
  48. Amy

    September 09, 2013 at 12:13 am

    So so hard... this is almost harder than other kinds of loss... you will be the only one who will know this little one the best. Nobody can understand the bond you will have. But it will make you hold the other kids a little tighter, and for me, it&#39;s comforting to know I have a son who is working and watching and waiting for me in heaven. It makes the ache a little easier.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      September 09, 2013 at 5:52 pm

      Amy,<br /><br />Thank you for your kind words.

      Reply
  49. Linda

    September 12, 2013 at 3:05 am

    My heart goes out to you and your family. You faith in the Lord is truly an inspiration.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      September 18, 2013 at 10:51 pm

      Thank you so much for your sweet words Linda!

      Reply
  50. Alysen

    September 16, 2013 at 11:40 am

    I&#39;m SO sorry to hear the news. We recently just lost our first baby @ 7 weeks so I know the feeling of losing a baby....very heartbreaking. You seem to be handling it as well as you can, allow yourself time to grieve and cry throughout the next several months. Only time will help heal the heart...thinking and praying for you all!

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      September 18, 2013 at 10:51 pm

      Hi Alysen,<br /><br />I am so sorry to hear of your loss. It is so hard to lose a baby. I am so sorry!<br /><br />My heart is with you and your family as well right now! And I am praying for you guys as well!<br /><br />Thank you for taking the time to leave a heartfelt comment and for sharing your tender story. And thank you so much for your kind thoughts and prayers!<br /><br />Ashley

      Reply
  51. Alysen

    September 16, 2013 at 11:42 am

    I&#39;m SO sorry to hear the news....we recently lost our first baby at 7 weeks so I know what it&#39;s like to lose a baby....very heartbreaking and your heart literally drops! Allow yourself the time to cry and grieve these next several months.....it&#39;s the only way to get through it. Thinking and praying for you and your family during this difficult time!

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      September 18, 2013 at 10:16 pm

      Hi Alysen,<br /><br />I am so sorry to hear of your loss. It is so hard to lose a baby. I am so sorry!<br /><br />My heart is with you and your family as well right now! And I am praying for you guys as well!<br /><br />Thank you for taking the time to leave a heartfelt comment and for sharing your tender story. And thank you so much for your kind thoughts and prayers!<br /><br />Ashley

      Reply
  52. Vivienne @ the V Spot

    October 17, 2013 at 12:01 pm

    Praying for you and your family, and so grateful you have such a strong faith to help carry you through this.

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      December 01, 2013 at 1:04 pm

      Thank you so much Vivienne!

      Reply
  53. Logan & Melissa

    November 29, 2013 at 10:37 am

    Ashley, I&#39;m so glad that I found you. I just had my little baby boy at 33 weeks. He is now 3 weeks old and we just found out two days ago that he had trisomy 18. We are lds as well. It was nice to read your story and know that I am not alone. Please email me if you ever want to talk. It might be nice to have another mom to lean on during this time. [email protected]

    Reply
  54. Logan & Melissa

    November 29, 2013 at 10:41 am

    Ashley, I&#39;m so glad I found you. I just had my baby boy at 33 weeks. He is now 3 weeks old and we just found out that he has trisomy 18. We are also lds. It was so nice to read your story and know that we are not alone. Please email me if you ever need to talk. It might be really nice to have someone to talk to during this tough time. [email protected]

    Reply
  55. Ashley Phipps

    December 01, 2013 at 1:05 pm

    Oh Melissa, I am sorry to hear that your little boy has T18 as well. Enjoy your time with him! I am sure he is just a wonderful little boy with a strong spirit! I am always up for talking if you&#39;d like. Much love and prayers are being sent your way.

    Reply
  56. Milli

    October 27, 2014 at 4:54 am

    Thank you for your beautiful raw honesty. Your words were so very moving.
    I am terribly sorry for your ordeal. Wishing you the strength to move forward each day, and that your family will find joy in these dark times.

    Reply
  57. Becky

    January 14, 2016 at 5:10 pm

    I don't know how things turned out for you and your family and it's none of my business. I read the entire entry you wrote. Just know that I quietly said a little prayer for you and will continue to do so. I'm so very sorry for all you've gone through. I do believe that when we die, we go back to our Father in Heaven, where we came from. I also believe that we are reunited with our family and friends, even our little pets, and that we know everyone's name and they know us. I'll hold two babies that never got to see me and they'll know I'm their momma. Love you and will be praying for you, Becky

    Reply
    • Ashley Phipps

      January 15, 2016 at 2:57 pm

      Thank you so much for your kind words, thoughts and prayers Becky. We lost our little guy at 28 weeks but I am grateful to know that we will be with him again one day in Heaven, just like you get to with your two babies. 🙂

      Reply

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